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Wonderful character development!

Sick Product of a Sick System

If you don't like this, we can't be friends.

It is neither dumb nor smart enough to be fun, and spends way too much time with its boring human characters.

This movie was a favorite of mine as a kid as it had me laughing the entire time. It also was actually a good whodunit movie even though that was exactly what this movie was trying to spoof to a certain degree. The story has to private eyes played by Knots and Conway investigating what appears to be a murder. As they go through the case more people are murdered with a very badly done poem with each death. The house they are in is neat to as it has many secret doors and passage ways in it. Though through it all Knots and Conway shine the brightest as they try to make heads or tails of the investigation interrogating everyone in the house at the time of the death and so on. Yes, interrogating deaf people, people with no tongues and a whole lot of others that are a bit off and such. All the while Conway's character talking about the sinister wookilar monster, a creature with a pig head. There are also multiple attempts to use pigeons to send word back to the yard. Yes, this movie was funny and the best movie Conway and Knots were in together.

This movie is rated PG which probably warranted. Today's PG films are usually pretty tame but they definitely put the "P" in this rating for a reason. Though they thoroughly enjoyed the "dumb detectives", my 2 young boys, ages 7 and 9, found many of the other characters to be scary and disturbing. Specifically, they found the Lord Morley character to be the most frightening.My 9 year old hasn't been able to go to sleep in his own bedroom for the 2 nights in a row since seeing this movie. He says the images are stuck in his head. My 7 yr old had some issues" with it as well the first night but has since resolved them after considering the whole of the film. Parents might want to preview this film before showing it to their younger children or at the very least watch it with them. This is rather surprising and disappointing for a PG rated film that was written by Tim Conway who was always so very funny on the Carol Burnett show.

I gave this film a 2 only because it did have potential with Tim Conway and Don Knotts in it. The effort shown by these two was admirable, considering the lousy script(written partly by Mr. Conway) and pacing of scenes. It just doesn't move as a movie like this should. While I consider Conway a good tv comedian, only Knotts ever showed potential for the big screen after leaving the Andy Griffith show. It is sad that this film didn't work out better. Oh well, both performers have earned a place in entertainment history-let them not be judged by this turkey.MM

After starring in the lackluster THE PRIZE FIGHTER, Tim Conway and Don Knotts teamed up again for THE PRIVATE EYES. Once again, Conway co-wrote the screenplay. The result is no masterpiece, but it is considerably superior to their previous film. For one thing, this film avoids the previous film's forced sentimentality, focusing exclusively on laughs and thrills. Another bonus is a consistently strong supporting cast; THE PRIZE FIGHTER had some ho-hum players, particularly Robin Clarke's dull villain. Particularly standing out in THE PRIVATE EYES are Trisha Noble as the sultry, quirky heiress whom detectives Conway and Knotts try to protect and Bernard Fox as the deranged butler Justin who goes berserk at the mention of the word "Murder."THE PRIVATE EYES is a throwback to all those old haunted house comedies like Abbott and Costello's HOLD THAT GHOST in which the comic protagonist[s] endures numerous scares while trying to figure out the mysterious goings-on. The Biltmore House and Gardens in Asheville, North Carolina, where the film was made is an appropriate Gothic setting for the chills that Conway and Knotts experience. Peter Matz provides a lively score that conveys eeriness and mystery in a sprightly manner, appropriate for a horror comedy.Unfortunately, the horrors per se- bodies turning up and then disappearing, a masked figure stalking the mansion, etc.- are cliched and the humor is inconsistent. There are some genuine laughs, such as when Knotts explains how the heiress's parents were killed and Conway, in his enthusiasm to figure out what clues the explanation could reveal, proceeds to perform the same actions the murderer did, nearly killing Knotts in the process. But THE PRIVATE EYES is also saddled with embarrassingly childish jokes (at one point, Knotts, Conway, and Fox do the old "walk this way" routine) and repetitive gags that quickly lose steam. The final gag ending is too predictable to be funny.But for the most part, the stars shine even with substandard material. As the submissive partner, Conway projects a dimness that is both likably earnest and humorously deadpan. Knotts as the take-charge partner is reminiscent of his Barney Fife characterization, conveying an air of cockiness that is constantly punctured by his ineptitude and cowardice. With less gifted comedians, THE PRIVATE EYES would be very rough sledding.For all its faults, it's difficult to dislike THE PRIVATE EYES. The film never pretends to be anything more than an old-fashioned horror comedy and Conway and Knotts clown around with no misconceptions of profundity. THE PRIVATE EYES is not essential viewing, but it's a pleasant time killer for a rainy day.