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Very very predictable, including the post credit scene !!!

If you don't like this, we can't be friends.

This film is so real. It treats its characters with so much care and sensitivity.

The film's masterful storytelling did its job. The message was clear. No need to overdo.

This one screams girl power in the age when a 2000's idiot critic may suggest it didn't exist. The truth is, for every guy flick you had a girl flick for the second date back in the 80's, because American cinema was about the creation of heterosexual couplings, not dividing or replacing them with candied men cowering before their women, or same sex unions.Of course, then the Madonna fans graduated from cinema schools.Girl power, from the virgin amazons guarding the talisman at the start, to the evil queen of supreme power who comes to claim it for use in what any woman in power generally would.Red Sonya, was so hot and so badass at the same time it made you proud to be light hued and ginger haired. Boy or girl, this movie had it all, and was a great empowerment film.Like "Legend", in that it brought boys and girls along for the ride and left both respecting the role of the other.The novelty characters and bad special effects are on a par with, Deathstalker, but the swordplay is very good for the time.A must watch for S&S fans.

Red Sonja is awful. Simple as that. But then that doesn't explain why I've been watching it for around thirty years and loving it more and more every time. It's a Schwarzenegger film. Only it isn't. It isn't because he's neither the titular character, nor in it enough to really be classed as so. Brigitte Nielsen is 'Red Sonja' and therefore the star. Only she was even less well-known at the time than our Austrian friend. He had at least played Conan and, believe it or not, was also supposed to reprise the barbarian's role here – only something to do with the film-makers not having the rights meant that his character had to be changed to 'Calador.' Arnie is basically the big name to sell the film on while his role extends to little more than an extended cameo.Anyway, the film follows Sonja and her quest to avenge the death of her family in a Lord of the Rings style world of magic and wizards. And she's pretty good. Or at least she's pretty. If you look closely at her she's actually not that muscular, so dispatching numerous bad guys with her sword is kind of a little far-fetched (but hardly the most far-fetched aspect of the story!). Plus every time she gets in danger, Conan (sorry – Calador), turns up and saves her, or at least someone else does. Like I said, Arnie pops up to help her, plus an annoying kid and his submissive wet blanket of a 'protector' (basically a fat servant who fights with a bone for some reason) also lend a hand every time she's about to get stabbed in the back (which happens more than you may imagine).The two leads may look the part, but the fact that neither are born to speak English and this film was made early in their careers, makes their dialogue extremely clunky and laughable. You can practically see them thinking of their next line before they deliver it.So, acting is poor, dialogue is laughable, characters pretty wooden. And yet I love it. It's one of those so-bad-it's-good kind of films. It has to be seen to be believed. If you like Conan (the original!) then you should like this. And, believe it or not, there are actually some attempts at 'character arcs' involved here. Sonja must learn to trust men (and do other things with them) while the young kid must learn to actually be nice and not be such an insufferable brat.Even Arnold was quoted as saying that Red Sonja is so bad that he uses it as a threat to discipline his children – if they misbehave they have to watch it ten times in a row, resulting in his kids never really giving him much bother. I must remember than when my own daughter wants to stay out late. Either way, it's so bad that I love it. Sorry, Arnold, but I disagree!

One of the great '80s cheeseball classics. A young red-haired woman named Sonja (Brigitte Nielsen) is the only survivor of a raid on her village by the evil Queen Gedren (Sandahl Bergman). She becomes a swordfighter and sets out to get revenge on Gedren. Oh and she swears she will not make love to any man unless he can best her in combat. Enter Arnold Schwarzenegger. Literally.Amazonian Brigitte Nielsen's performance is laughably wooden. She is attractive, though, and does well in the fight scenes. Arnold is top-billed due to his being a bigger star than Nielsen but he also does a better job acting. Not saying he would win any awards for this role but he at least gives the part some humor. Brigitte barely manages to speak her lines properly half the time. In keeping with the Conan movies, Red Sonja has comic relief sidekicks and a villain dressed all in black. Ernie Reyes and Paul Smith are the sidekicks and they're both funny. They steal the movie, really. Sandhal Bergman is the villain and she does fine considering. She was much better in Conan. The sets and props are nice. Probably were considered cheap for their time but in today's age of CGI it's nice to see people interacting with real things.It's not a bad movie of its type. You just can't take it seriously. If you enjoy cheesy sword & sorcery movies, you'll find something to like here. But if you're expecting a female equivalent of Conan the Barbarian, forget about it. It's a fun time-passer but nothing more.

The third film in the Conan trilogy...well it pretty much was wasn't it. This film is directed by Richard Fleischer who also directed 'Conan the Destroyer', the same studio, Dino De Laurentiis Company, made all three films, Sandahl Bergman was in this film and 'Conan the Barbarian' and of course Arnie starred in all three.I mean lets be honest here, Arnie plays Lord Kalidor, the character is virtually a Conan clone, I dunno why they didn't just make him Conan and be done with it. I believe Sonja comes from the Conan universe originally (I may be wrong) so why not? I'm guessing there may have been copyright issues somewhere.So its the same story again for this fantasy adventure, need I describe the plot? A small band of goodies up against an evil baddie leader and all her baddie warriors who are all holed up in an intimidating fortress. Arnie rides around in his rather unattractive red sparkly jumpsuit (changes to a black number out of the blue half way through) whilst Nielsen sports a long red mullet cut, but she's still cute.This is suppose to be the weakest of the Arnie broadsword adventures but personally I don't see it. Its no worse than the other two and gives you just as much visual sorcery. In fact there's more fantasy stuff going on here than 'CtB', giant pet spiders, giant skeleton bridges, a metallic sea monster thingy and a silly Flash Gordon style baddie wizard. This film boarders more on other films such as 'Krull' and a bit of 'Willow' in my opinion.Reasonable amounts of blood and limb chopping but not overkill. Everything looks a bit tacky later on in the film but again no worse than the other two films. Unfortunately there is an annoying kid in this film, kinda like Data from 'The Goonies' or Short Round from 'Temple of Doom' (same kid actor there), tends to give the film a more slapstick approach at times, 'Conan the Barbarian' was always the most grown up of the three.At this point I reckon Arnie was possibly getting worried he may end up typecast as a barbarian meathead in fantasy films. I can see why this was his last as all three of these films are very similar and not overly wonderful frankly. Still the musical score was always in good hands with Morricone at the helm, how did they manage that? As a kid I loved these films, nowadays the rose tinted shades can't quite save them, amusing and naff, oh and the baddie Queen is a lesbian. Oh yeah, the whole story is down to Sonja simply rejecting her advances at the start, fancy that.5/10