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The Age of Commercialism

Thanks for the memories!

Good movie but grossly overrated

if their story seems completely bonkers, almost like a feverish work of fiction, you ain't heard nothing yet.

Im a huge fan of Paris Hilton. So I saw this on TV and recorded it. It starts out with about 8 wealthy British twenty somethings who go to a beautiful country house in Scotland. Its hysterical because Paris Hilton is a peacock among the pigeons, she walks into the house in a hot pink track suit. Everyone else is wearing muted shades of brown. She is tan, they are pale, she is blonde, they are brunette. I love how she talks, its basically like she is playing herself, but Paris is a personality so its cool. Personally I love how she plays the character Jo, a rich international jet set type. She talks to her boyfriend in a way thats actually realistic, she says, "First you never buy me any presents and now you don't even want to go away with me?" He buys her some kind of early cell phone, planner type gadget that cost 800 but it really cost 600. She says, "Its the only gift I've ever gotten from you and Im going to keep it. Cheap Skate!" Its hilarious, then she sashays around, everywhere she walks she struts like a model and she is just so damn beautiful. In another scene she slips into a girl room and tells her she looks fabulous, "Where were you last weekend?" Paris replies, "I totally forgot I went skiing." Then she gives her a gift and damns what the Swiss were wearing. In another scene she struts in to a girls room to borrow the bath. Every scene she does, she steals the spotlight. Her performance might not be A+ to most people but I loved it. Its funny and she plays the role well. The movie is not so good after the first 30 minutes, because at that 30 minutes mark Paris dies. So if your a Paris fan, and I mean she looks amazing, then watch this movie. Its not bad as horror films go, sure its low budget and cheesy but no one sucks. Overall a great little 85 minute movie. Enjoy!!!

This review will contain spoilers! I am going to do this a bit differently, I will simply post some notes i jotted down while watching.00:16 Why does the film start with a screaming girl with a knife in her hands?1:11 So, they are all driving black Scodas to the house with plenty of "scary" background music for no reason.05:40 These people are all utterly unsympathetic.09:04 This is completely engaging.13:11 they are trying to establish some characters - and failing, the dialog doesn't get through to me at all.16:17 He is leaving the group in a horror film, he' so dead16:39 Will there be blood coming out of the faucet?16:52 Nope, but there was a jump scare in the mirror.23:17 Unnecessary nudity, my favorite kind.32:55 Whatsherface has been killed but I just don't care. Im just bothered by the murky lighting, why don't they turn on the lights?34:53 It took them this long to think about looking for the staff?42:05 The scary killer ghost is doing almost nothing so the filmmakers are trying to establish some secondary conflict - which comes off as too forced.42:35 Doorknobs are not interesting enough to warrant being zoomed in on.43:36 Dark hair girl (I guess her character has a name but I don't care) is a real jerk.43:57 The doctor guy is such a wuss.48:50 Wait what, if all the lights are out, how come that one is still on?49:17 Unnecessary dramatic sound effect52:31 Hw does she suddenly know so much?1:02:12 They are actually managing to build up some tension, also they've got a god Schrödingsers cat thing going on.1:06:54 This pep talk is lame.1:10:50 There is surprisingly little snow for a snow storm.1:14:38 Dramatic moment fails due to lack of investment in the characters.1:16:24 I never knew getting stabbed in the shoulder could be deadly.1:19:24 Movie is not worthy of summing up monologueSo there you have it. Generally speaking, Nine Lives is an engaging film about unsympathetic characters.

Watching Nine Lives truly has a formula and storyline that is unique. I found myself wondering how the characters were going to get out of this crazy curse. The dialog was in typical horror movie fashion, and gave a bit of a cheesy unrealistic vibe. Some of the acting is quite frankly laughable. The standouts are Ameila Warner and David Nicolle who give the most emotion filled and honest performances. The biggest flaw is heiress Paris Hilton, it's not that she's a bad actress per-say, but I feel like the only reason she was cast is because she is so widely recognized. Her picture is front and center in the poster and yet, she is the first victim, dying in the first 30 or so minutes. I find that very unfair to the above mentioned standouts who are clearly the main focus in this movie.Camera work, lighting, special effects are all casualties to the low-budget that this movie had to work with, which the storyline strongly needed.Overall, I recommend that if you are a Paris Hilton fan and want to see this, it is better to rent it or else you are wasting you money. It is decent, not as bad as I expected honestly, I think it would have been much better sans-Paris (or at least not make her the center of the poster, which is almost like false advertising) and with a bigger budget.

Nine friends celebrate at a mansion in Scotland. After a little dinner and drinking and too much conversation, one friend stumbles upon a curse and one by one the guests are faced with the threat of death.This film has so many problems with it, I don't know where to begin. First, the film "stars" Paris Hilton, even though she has the smallest role in the movie. I suspect her presence is the only reason the film was picked up at all, even though she serves no purpose and cannot act in this movie to save her life (she's worse in this than in "House of Wax").When the Lions Gate logo came on, my friend and I thought we might be safe. Lions Gate makes some great films. Well, they make bad films, too, it seems. What possessed them to put their name on here, I don't know. With all due respect, I hope they lost money.The first half of the film is a dinner scene with people sitting and talking about literally nothing. Nothing of interest, nothing related to the plot, nothing. A brief philosophical debate arises, but goes nowhere. As my friend says, this film was very innovative for a horror film: it might have been the first one that tried to kill the audience.The death scenes are horrible. Basically, all deaths consist of a stabbing in the stomach: a magic stabbing! Shirts are never torn, but somehow a small blood stain appears and the victim becomes quite dead at a rapid pace.None of the actors are worth caring about and the whole film is in shambles. Most annoying for me (besides the utter boredom) was the tendency to remind us we were in Scotland (the words "Scotland" or "Scotish" were repeated many times... for no reason. And there was a golf club).This film is even too slow and pointless for "Mystery Science Theater 3000", so if there is a way to make something blink out of existence (like a memory hole), someone please make this your first target.