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Simply Perfect

Wow! What a bizarre film! Unfortunately the few funny moments there were were quite overshadowed by it's completely weird and random vibe throughout.

After playing with our expectations, this turns out to be a very different sort of film.

Although I seem to have had higher expectations than I thought, the movie is super entertaining.

Let's make one thing clear right at the start: this is not a good film.There is nothing new or inventive about this film. I do not mind film- makers using old-and-tried tropes IF they use them to make a polished and accomplished B-movie. But in cases like The Bleeding, where mediocrity was all that ever seemed achievable (or worth aiming for) for everyone involved, you need to come up with something new: low budget needs to be outweighed by higher creativity. But there is nothing creative about this script or this film. It has a very average "seen-it-before" plot, and many things in this film I consider well below average (writing, directing, etc.). However, there are worse films than this, so 1-star-ratings do not seem justified to me. This is probably a 3 out of 10; I gave it one extra star for Michael Madsen's performance, who - unlike Vinnie Jones - actually put in some effort.

Don't ask me to explain why I actually sat through this whole thing. Maybe it was curiosity after reading the other reviews. Could one film be THAT bad?? Unfortunately, the answer is a resounding yes. Sitting in a corner pondering your navel is time better spent.Seriously, the other reviewers are not underestimating this movie. There is not one single teeny tiny thing that redeems this movie in any way whatsoever.The acting and casting are just as bad as mentioned by other reviewers. But worst of all to me was the writing.I can say without a doubt that my miniature donkey could've written a better script. A MUCH better script. By hand! It would be laughable if it weren't so pathetically sad that there are good scripts that can't get made, and yet this script, that isn't worth using as toilet paper, actually made it to film.Nope. Not a single redeeming quality in this film. There's not even any mildly entertaining nudity or killings.Never, ever, ever, in my 40 plus years of watching movies as an avid fan, have I ever seen such worthless tripe.Please do the world a favor and burn every single master copy.

A man's brother apparently dies in combat in the Middle East. And yet, this same brother is somehow connected to Cain, a vampire clan leader. And there is a legend of a slayer... and some muscle cars...A film so simple as this should not be so hard to describe, but it is. Someone wanted to write "Blade", but it was already written. They also wanted to write "Fast and the Furious", but that idea was taken. So, what did they do? They meshed them together in one film, threw in some other nonsense, and made a film. It took almost two years to get released, and I am not surprised.First of all, I cannot stress how much the main character (Michael Matthias) wants to be Vin Diesel. He looks like the Wal-Mart brand of Vin Diesel, Wal-Diesel or something. And how DMX is thrown in as a guy who knows way too much about vampires and somehow knows a slayer when he sees one... not sure why.Vinnie Jones plays Cain, and it is nice to see him with (presumably fake) hair. But this is not a great role for him and makes his acting look terrible. Michael Madsen is Father Roy, and while I always enjoy seeing Madsen, he does too many genre films with people who cannot bring out his best. Aside from Tarantino's films, what is the last great thing he did? Katherine von Drachenberg (aka Kat Von D) also appears.The plot holes, time line, and more just do not add up on this to a decent movie. The acting is weak, the directing is decent, though it is clear the emphasis was on the action and not the acting. The director's background is as a stunt man, and I can easily say the stunts here are just fine... the film is, however, a mess... and I do not know who to blame first.

Stupefyingly dull, atrociously scripted, risible effects, less action, humour, excitement than an average episode of the A Team. A real actor (Armand Assante) does a charity visit for about 3 minutes and is never seen again. Another real actor appears (Michael Madsen) and simply makes you spend the rest of the movie thinking to yourself 'Why Michael? Why?'The dialogue is just one pathetic and banal cliché after another. The voice over narration just highlights the terrible dialogue and the wooden delivery from the movies lead actor who I won't even name in the hope he never makes another movie, unless it's possibly as a stunt double for Vin Diesel. I will not even donate my DVD copy to a charity shop, I would feel so bad about palming it off on someone else.No redeeming features at all.This movie annoyed me so much I signed up for IMDb just to come here and disparage it.