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Sorry, this movie sucks

The movie's neither hopeful in contrived ways, nor hopeless in different contrived ways. Somehow it manages to be wonderful

what a terribly boring film. I'm sorry but this is absolutely not deserving of best picture and will be forgotten quickly. Entertaining and engaging cinema? No. Nothing performances with flat faces and mistaking silence for subtlety.

It's the kind of movie you'll want to see a second time with someone who hasn't seen it yet, to remember what it was like to watch it for the first time.

While filming a photo shoot in the jungles of Central America, an airplane carrying the producer and several fashion models is shot down and they are subsequently forced to travel on foot in order to escape the vicious drug dealers who are after them. Unfortunately, the producer named "Larry Schecter" (Marjoe Gortner) is soon killed and they are all taken captive and led back to the jungle mansion where the sadistic drug warlord named "Cesar Santiago" (Paul L. Smith) is anxiously awaiting them. Now rather than reveal any more I will just say that this film had some potential but the weak acting and rather meandering plot greatly affected the movie as a whole. However, for what it's worth, I thought the presence of Suzi Horne (as "Pam Ross"), Mindi Iden ("Marci") and to a lesser extent Nina van Pallandt ("Joanna Quinn") brightened the scenery to a certain degree--but that still wasn't enough to overcome the general lack of intensity and passion shown in this film. Because of that I have rated this movie accordingly. Slightly below average.

****SPOILERS**** Numb nut like movie with the distinction that one of its stars Dennis Hooper never made it on the screen by being replaced by Marjoe Gortner after he was arrested by the local police while walking in public stark naked and as drunk as a skunk. The film itself had to do with a Mafia South American alliance to ship a load of cocaine to the states that went, excuse the pun, south instead of north of the border. That's when the mob boys headed by Vito Mastranga, John Vernon, decided to double cross their Brazilian partners headed by the gorilla like, as well as cultured, Cesar Santiago, Paul L. Smith, that lead to the fireworks at the very end of the movie.There's also this group of fashion models lead by Joanna Quinn, Nina Van Pollandt, who's plane crashed in rebel held , the Santiago boys, territory that were held hostage who in the end revolted and brought the entire drug operation to an end. That with DEA agent D'Antoni, Dana "Egg" Elcar, coming to the girls rescue, as if they needed him, with a fleet of helicopters. As for Santiago and his #1 henchman Nick Spilotro, Alex "Rip" Cord, they together with Mafia chief Mastranga ended up dead on arrival when the two crime faction came to blows with each other over Mastrangas double cross. This also lead to Santiago's step sister Angel, played by the busty Sybil Danning,getting wiped out when a hand grenade, thrown by Mastranga men, blew up under her feet.****SPOILERS**** Slow moving at first the film picked up steam in the final sequence with the models taking control of the situation, after being beaten and gang raped by Santigao's men, and putting an end to this massive drug operation. With all the action in the movie the best was saved for last with what sounded like a drunk and high on drugs Marina Arcangeli singing, or trying to sing, the movies theme song "I'm in your Reach".

A group of gorgeous models doing a photo shoot in South America run afoul of ruthless drug lord Cesar Santiago (hulking Paul Smith in excellent smoothly villainous form). However, the gals manage to acquire some heavy duty firepower and make a fierce stand against their cruel and vile captors. Director Ernst R. von Theumer, who also co-wrote the cheerfully crass script with Robert Collector, relates the entertainingly trashy story at a brisk pace, maintains a blithely lurid tone throughout, stages the last reel outburst of stirring action with real rip-roaring gusto, delivers a handy helping of bloody violence and raw brutality, and further spices things up with a tasty smattering of gratuitous female nudity. The choice cast of veteran exploitation cinema regulars have a ball with the winningly low-grade material: Statuesque blonde goddess Sybil Danning vamps it up deliciously as Santiago's sadistic lesbian sister Angel, John Vernon really sinks his teeth into his meaty role as jolly and easygoing mobster Vito Mastranga, Margoe Gortner frets up an obnoxious storm as whiny and irritating modeling agency producer Larry Schecter, Woody Strode projects considerable charm and authority as Santiago's formidable right-hand man Luther, and Alex Cord does well as Mastranga's antsy and slimy attorney partner Nick Spilotro. Moreover, Dana Eclar is a hoot as excitable fed D'Antoni and the always delightful Louisa Moritz has a regrettably minor part as sweetly ditsy make-up artist Laura McCashin. Nicholas Josef von Sternberg's glossy cinematography gives the picture an impressively slick look. Roland Baumgarter's rousing score hits the right-on rocking spot. The theme song is hilariously awful. A total schlocky blast.

I admit that I might have had a higher opinion of "Jungle Warriors" if I had been able to see it in its full form; the Region 2 DVD version features many painfully obvious cuts that make the film more of a jumble than it already is (it would struggle to get a PG-13 in this form). What's left of "Jungle Warriors" is not that good, anyway: it only gets interesting when the girls are machine gunning down the bad guys, but that doesn't happen often enough (actually, most of the bad guys just kill each other off). Admittedly, casting Paul L. Smith and Sybil Danning as kinky half-siblings was an inspired exploitation idea, but Danning is actually kind of wasted in this film. *1/2 out of 4.