Watch Nukie For Free

Save your money for something good and enjoyable

Excellent, Without a doubt!!

A terrific literary drama and character piece that shows how the process of creating art can be seen differently by those doing it and those looking at it from the outside.

Great story, amazing characters, superb action, enthralling cinematography. Yes, this is something I am glad I spent money on.

The only reason I saw this movie was because Brad Jones AKA the Cinema Snob, said it was the worst movie he ever reviewed. Well, I think he might have found one or two movies that were worse, but it doesn't matter. This film isn't really a ripoff of ET, as it basically has no similar plot at all. I guess you could just consider it better than something like "The Pod People" which was a more obvious knockoff. This movie actually did make me laugh a few times with how bad it was, so I guess I'll give it that. That still doesn't excuse it from being a terrible movie.This movie tells the story of an alien named Nukie who becomes stranded on Earth with his brother in another continent. It really gets pitiful when the apes start talking. Now, it is stated that Nukie has the ability to learn any language, but that still doesn't make sense. How was he not able to understand the giraffe and the rhinos he saw earlier? Plus, the rhinos sound like horses! Besides that, the costumes in this film are terrible. I couldn't tell if they were meant to be like deformed monkeys or deformed bears. Nukie's friend is being researched on and manages to escape from the room without any explanation. Then he just goes back into the room. Why?! Nukie has the ability to teleport, but he doesn't use it at the end. Oh, and he can also accidentally make earthquakes or something. He just apologizes for doing that. Huh? There's also this weird subplot with a talking computer that has an evil laugh while still helping Nukie's friend. I don't know how they far they traveled or how they all met up in the end, but I don't care. *

BTW the above rating is on a "it's so bad it's good" scale.I recently watched this movie after reading all the user comments about Nukie. Some of these writeups had me peeing in my pants I was laughing so hard...especially the one guy who said, "I hate God for allowing Nukie to be made". That sold it for me. Call it perverse curiosity, if you will...the same curiosity that drives one to watch such films as Faces of Death or I Spit on Your Grave.This movie is certainly atrocious, but I wouldn't say it's totally unwatchable. My friends and I regularly get together to have "Awesomely Bad Movie" viewings and make fun of them in Mystery Science Theater fashion. This one managed to keep the laughs rolling. I mean, a few people walked out of the room when the chimpanzee started talking, but that was perhaps the only lowpoint. The rest is just a pure mindnumbing, jawdropping, "what the f*ck?", knee-slapping good time.I would like to comment, though, how much Nukie was pissing me off. He did absolutely NOTHING to help anyone in this movie. He terrifies the villagers by possessing vehicles with his powers, knocks pots and pans all over the place, causes earthquakes. How about when that kid got bit by the snake? Nukie didn't do sh*t about it. Yeah, he put on a good fireworks show, though. Or when him and the kid are travelling by foot for days, and then finally he gets the bright idea to turn them both into balls of light so that they can travel faster. Or what about the very end when they're reunited and then they turn into balls of light and fly off. Why the f*ck didn't they do that in the beginning? I seriously wanted Nukie and his brother to die in this movie. They are such disgusting-looking creatures. That scene where Nukie goes over the waterfall I stood up really excited hoping that he'd get killed. He survived though. Damn.My one friend says, "This is absolutely the worst movie I've ever seen. This includes pornos". I want to force Rob Zombie to watch Nukie. I think it's the only thing that can possibly terrify him.

The pain is the only thing that will distract you from the terminal suck of the movie. The plot line is like watching actors trying to break out of their usual roles of downs syndrome porn and the main character looks like a deep-fried shag carpet soaked in cheese made rancid manlove to ET's bastard cousin. It goes downhill from there. Wrought with so many plot holes I felt like my teeth were being jarred from their sockets just from the righteous fury, I felt the minutes this movie was bleeding from my life dripping out of my soul. I feel that if I look down I will see the tattered remains of the person I was before I saw this movie floating in a pool of my lost humanity.

Here's what I can say: this movie is SO BAD. NEVER UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES SEE THIS MOVIE. I try to see all the bad movies I can, and this tops them all. It's not even funny to mock, it's just that bad. It's a test of patience. Even if you think you wanna see this movie, you really don't. I'll leave you with a bit of the wit from this movie; while the scientists are taking miko's pulse with the x-ray machine, they still don't know whether he's an animal, mineral, or vegetable. Go back over that last sentence again. Yes. That actually does happen in the movie. Honestly, when I finally finished this movie I felt like dying(it took me a while because I watched about the first half hour and needed to stop on account of the utter idiocy of this movie). It is terrible. I can't stress that enough. And now I speak directly to the people who like watching bad movies: I know you've seen movie that people have told you not to see, but skip this one. It hurts to watch.