Watch Safety: Harm Hides at Home For Free

hyped garbage

This is a tender, generous movie that likes its characters and presents them as real people, full of flaws and strengths.

This is a small, humorous movie in some ways, but it has a huge heart. What a nice experience.

It is encouraging that the film ends so strongly.Otherwise, it wouldn't have been a particularly memorable film

I'm amazed, reading reviews here and elsewhere, that nobody seems to have listened to the plan the aliens outline to Karen Kingsley when she becomes Guardiana / Safety Woman. It's difficult to make out what they're saying, but the gist of it is that the aliens are expanding their empire, and they need Earth's children as slave labor for new building. As such, the aliens want to make sure that the children don't kill themselves and reduce the available workforce.It's a wonderfully goofy film, but everyone seems to overlook the sinister motive.

This safety short concerns a woman named Miss Kingsley, who for some unexplained reason, is made a safety superhero called Safety Woman by a group of aliens who sound like the Chipmunks. She is freelance architect and crossing guard when she not safety woman and as Safety woman she seems to be very well known by the kids in her neighborhood or town. (The range of her powers is undefined.) While she gives good advice, some of the advice(such as proper wiring and safe gun storage) seems to apply more to adults than to the children in the film. Also, there are some concerning lapses in her enforcement of safety rules. For example, one young man makes a hamburger after playing basketball without washing his hands, Safety Woman only appears after the burger catches fire. She also seems to know when children are doing something unsafe but only appears when the child is in actual danger. While there is good advice for kids but the bizarre way the advice is presented, along with Safety Woman's alarming omnipresence, makes it very hard for me to recommend this film for anything other than as a subject for riffing.

Let me introduce you to Karen Kingsley. Part-time architect, part-time crossing guard, full-time superhero. Or at least, that's what this short is trying to convince us. Instead Karen Kingsley a.k.a. Safetywoman a.k.a. Guardiana (seriously, pick a name and stick with it) looks like she bought a bad costume at her local Ricky's, spreading the word about safety from everything from fire to poison to falling from ladders. It's really hard to take the short seriously when you take one look at the outfit, complete with plastic shield, a three-finger salute with the mantra AWARE ALERT ALIVE, and I'm guessing a turkey baster. And how did she become this superhero? Thanks to some invisible aliens that sound like Alvin, Simon, and Theodore. We really could use more female superheroes, but this is ridiculous.