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Thralls
The story focuses on a group of 6 beautiful women called Thralls, referred to as "the white trash of vampires;" effectively a lower species of vampire. They don't kill people, they don't have the ability to turn their victims into vampires and they can't fly. These Thralls are under the control of Mr. Jones, the vampire who sired them, and whom they are trying desperately to escape. To do this they must complete a blood ritual which will turn them into full-blown vampires. Their plans hit a snag when Ashley, the younger sister of one of the Thralls, comes to visit. Ashley has no idea what her sister has been up to since moving to the big city nor what she has become..
Release : | 2005 |
Rating : | 3.9 |
Studio : | Insight Film Studios, Trademark Entertainment, |
Crew : | Production Design, Set Decoration, |
Cast : | Lorenzo Lamas Leah Cairns Sonya Salomaa Moneca Delain Lisa Marie Caruk |
Genre : | Horror |
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A Masterpiece!
Easily the biggest piece of Right wing non sense propaganda I ever saw.
...about being any good. Because "Thralls" does actually give a damn about being enjoyable and giving B-movie fanatics a fun time. Really, this might very well be the definition of modern day camp. A bunch of gorgeous, hot-looking half-vampire babes open up a nightclub in which unsuspecting, trouble-making ravers end-up as a midnight snack. The plan is to free themselves from slavery by vampire-lord Johnny (played by Lorenzo Lamas who strikes an intentional ridiculous note here) and hereby upgrade themselves from 'thralls' to full-blooded vampires. Johnny-boy has a plan for himself, though: summoning an evil demon to make himself an über-vampire. It's all good and enjoyable campy fun. The CGI demon-head near the end is so crappy that it doesn't even live up to Playstation 1 graphics. But that's all part of the game. And if you don't have any sense of humor at all, then don't even consider giving "Thralls" aka "Blood Angels" a watch.On a side-note: I always have to laugh with Lorenzo Lamas. Can't help it, when I hear his name pop up, because I've always considered him to be a not-so-very-good actor (and I'm being polite here). But in "Thralls" he's actually quite a bit of fun to watch. And to my surprise, he even managed to entertain me a second time very recently, when I popped in this Z-grade CGI-infested rubbish called "Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus" (proudly produced by The Asylum company). Good old Lorenzo really is a hoot and a whole barrel of fun in this one. Virtually all of his lines had me laughing out loud. And he seems very well aware of how to deliver his pun-filled nonsense. Seems like he does have some talent for something after all... Go, Lamas, go! A few more of these flicks, and you'll hit a strike! Anyway, I think I'm straying off topic here... But do support Lorenzo Lamas, and go watch "Shark Thralls vs. Blood Octopus" or... something... Which movie was I talking about again?
*SPOILER ALERT* *SPOILER ALERT*A bunch of hot vampire, (Thralls if you want to get technical), women open a nightclub. They are trying to escape the clutches of vampire master Lamas. A sister of one of the vamps shows up. She is ignorant of their vampire ways. Soon she will get a lesson in how to be a successful Thrall and how to waste a beautiful B-movie concept.Speaking as a B-movie lover, I'm outraged at this film. I don't say that lightly. What a waste. You have a bar full of hot vampire chicks and not one of them gets naked? Come on! OK. OK. The DJ flashes her breasts to expose some sort of snake like monster. But they used a body double for the DJ. No way was that her breasts. The cover of the DVD has five or six babes in scantily clad lingerie and the tag line is "Being wild is in their blood." Yeah whatever. When you have more topless guys than girls, you know that the filmmakers don't have a clue as to who will be watching their movie. "Blood Angels" had the potential to be a great exploitation flick but instead went down a very mundane path to B-movie oblivion.To be fair, "Blood Angels" is not a horribly-made flick. You won't want to rip your eyes out while watching it. But it's another classic case of the bait and switch tactic that B-movie filmmakers cherish. You think you're renting a naughty vampire movie but instead are stuck with a Thrall empowerment flick. They are going to show that evil man that he's not in control of them. *Sigh* Wasteful. Sad. Tragic.
Mr. Jones (Lorenzo Lamas) is a vampire living an upper class life in Iowa, of all places, in this Ron Oliver-directed film. He has a Renfield-like acolyte named Rennie (Richard Ian Cox), and most importantly, he's keeping six really hot "half-vampire" slave babes chained up, dressed in sexy white lingerie, in his strangely white "attic". These slaves, or thralls ("thrall" was the Scandinavian word for "slave" during the Viking age), are the focus of the film. At the end of the opening sequence, they manage to escape. Shortly after we see them running a rave club (still in Iowa, amusingly enough). A major subplot involves Ashley (Siri Baruc), a sister of one of the thralls, who has runaway from an abusive situation with her father. But has she run into something even more frightening?I like most films, especially most horror, and I start watching any movie with very few preconceptions and a high score in mind. For Blood Angels, repeatedly I would be cruising along thinking it deserved a high rating, then it would do something awkward or too corny for its own good, and I'd feel compelled to give it a lower mark. But then it would turn around and make up for the problems with another move, and so on. The final verdict, obviously, was a 7. However, for much of the film it sustained an 8 for me.Among the minor problems are that the fight/attack scenes tend to be cut too quickly, there is a strange section of repeated footage in the middle (it's ostensibly a dream/hallucination) that seems like padding, and the bulk of the film is set in a club that just looks like a big warehouse. Sometimes such a limited setting works, but here it tends to become monotonous. It feels transparently like a budget-saving device. In interviews about the film, the cast and crew have made much of the supposed vampire mythology extensions in the film. They were exaggerating, at least slightly. While the thrall idea is unique for the film world, at least in its details, the influences for this "extension" were probably a combination of the mythology of role-playing games such as Vampire: The Masquerade and the "gay vampire" novel by author Michael Schiefelbein entitled Vampire Thrall (interestingly, early reports had Blood Angels' plot as an erotic gay vampire flick--that turned out to be wrong (or it was changed); whether that's disappointing or not probably depends on your gender and orientation, especially when we consider that the protagonists are beautiful women clad in skimpy clothing). Of course, if we look at it from an even less fine-grained perspective, Blood Angels is basically a Dracula story centered on his brides, where the brides have been merged with the popular idea of the vampire acolyte, but where they are not quite willing to be underlings--they're just partial vampires instead. The thralls' feeding methods are unusual, but certainly not unprecedented--similar ideas have appeared in a number of other vampire films, including Les Avaleuses (1973), Spermula (1976) and the more well-known and mainstream Once Bitten (1985). Blood Angels may be unprecedented in featuring a protagonist (Ashley) partially modeled on The Wizard of Oz' (1939) Dorothy, and also for featuring an odd bit part for an actor dressed up as Hunter S. Thompson.Other elements, such as a subplot involving the Necronomicon and raising demons from other dimensions are relative horror clichés by this point, although such things did not tend to be combined very often with vampire lore until "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" (1997). Also like Buffy, Blood Angels mixes its modern Gothic atmosphere and liberal tongue-in-cheek humor with martial arts. Part of becoming a vampire, or even a thrall, is that you suddenly turn into a kick-ass kung fu expert. Combining vampires and martial arts is an idea that extends at least back to The Legend of the 7 Golden Vampires (1974). Of course, post-Buffy, at least, having strong, intelligent and resourceful modern women as protagonists in a horror film isn't unique, but it is still relatively unusual, and it is certainly welcomed. Some feminists might cringe at the eye candy factor, which is very high throughout the film, but more enlightened feminists realize that being beautiful and proud of it isn't akin to playing a subordinate role. Also on the positive but unusual side is that the film is set in Iowa (though unfortunately not shot there, but surely that would have proved to be too much for the film's budget). It's at least nice to see writers and directors try to be a bit more creative with their locales.I was surprised that Blood Angels had as much humor as it does. There is a very funny comic relief character known as Doughboy (Kevin Ohtsji), an Asian youth trying to be "rap hip", somewhat reminiscent of Nadir (Saïd Serrari), the comic relief wannabe rapper Algerian in Samouraïs (2002) (Although it's a bit bizarre--but I like bizarreness--that the last five minutes of the film before the final credits run are a rap/hip-hop promotional video). And Rennie is also funny as a continually suffering zombie, reminiscent of Gabriel's (Christopher Walken) zombie assistants in the Prophecy (1979) films, or, without the "slave" aspect, Jack Goodman (Griffin Dunne) in An American Werewolf in London (1981) or Mick (Seth Green) and Pnub (Elden Henson) in Idle Hands (1999). Another positive aspect is that the special effects are good for a low-budget film. For the other roles, the performances are fine; nothing exceptional, but not problematic, either, even if Lamas starts to show off his scenery-chewing chops by the end.Overall, Blood Angels is above average, especially if you're a big horror fan and you enjoy watching attractive women. It's not likely to be remembered as a groundbreaker, but it's more than sufficient entertainment for 90 minutes. It also leaves room for a sequel, which would be welcomed.
This movie was uniquely horrible. I would never have seen it if I wasn't horribly bored and it just happened to be on TV. It's about this group of women who host a huge party out in the middle of no where. Seemingly innocent, right? Of course not. The story focuses on Ashley (Siri Baruc) a young girl who has an unfortunate home life, thus goes to live with her older sister, who, by golly, is part vampire. The story involves a plethora of sexually charged young men being bitten by women with long, very pointy teeth in regions which are very precious to them. Also, a woman's breasts have some sort of demon popping out of them, to attack a young rapper Asian named Doughboy. What more could you ask for in a B-grade Canadian horror film?