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Space Warriors
The son of a retired astronaut competes to win a seat on the next space shuttle.
Release : | 2013 |
Rating : | 4.5 |
Studio : | Meteor Film Productions, Walden Media, Arc Entertainment, |
Crew : | Production Design, Set Decoration, |
Cast : | Josh Lucas Mira Sorvino Dermot Mulroney Booboo Stewart Danny Glover |
Genre : | Adventure Science Fiction Family |
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Reviews
Absolutely Fantastic
The movie is wildly uneven but lively and timely - in its own surreal way
All of these films share one commonality, that being a kind of emotional center that humanizes a cast of monsters.
It is an exhilarating, distressing, funny and profound film, with one of the more memorable film scores in years,
Why, oh why isn't there a zero on the scoring system? The Room. Tycus. Anything with Adam Sandler in it.These are all better movies than this piece of crap. Even the suspend-your-belief moments are suspending their beliefs.Most of the badness comes from the script (third-rate even by Disney-standards), but a lot comes from the super bad acting by Thomas Horn (Jimmy). It's over the top, he's got a squeaky "Gee Whiz" voice, with all the fake surprise of that expression. His actions are weird, kind of immoral, and unsympathetic actions (designed to make the character grow later on) are totally fake and why oh why would that girl be attracted to him? Oh yeah: his team mates are even LESS attractive. He's girly, and not in a good way. You want to shout "It's getting better" at him all the time, but that would not refer to his acting, only to his conveyed personal life.This is just bad, very bad.0/10 The Melancholic Alcoholic.
I really, really hate movies like this and I hate them with a passion. I don't even recall seeing this all the way to the end as I fell asleep and I dreamed a much better movie.Movies like this, where know-it-all kids have to save the day, or movies where kids have all the answers and show up all the adults is really a deplorable premise for any movie, whether it be a drama, comedy or a movie that's specifically aimed at kids or tweens.Basically this is yet another stupid movie where kids are rounded up and have to save the day as all the combined adult brains and experience at NASA haven't got a clue. That's pretty much it in a nutshell.Not only would it never happen, (I could care less how intelligent a child prodigy may be), it's been done to death and it's just a showcase for kids that they too can be precocious brats and know-it-alls as well until they get a clip over the ear from parents, teachers and anyone else in authority who wouldn't actually stand for their nonsense.Do yourselves a favour and stick pins in your eyes instead.
Sorry guys, but this film was a horrible disappointment. It's proof that trying to do recipe-based films for children is best only done by Disney.When the main character "runs away" to Space Camp, it's apparently under the presumption that if he wins the competition (a phony competition, a la the Top Gun trophy in that movie) he'll outfox his mother into letting him go on a real spaceflight to the International Space Station. The parent astonishingly DON'T CALL THE COPS to get the darn kid back when his ruse to fool each parent into thinking he's with the other one. Shades of the Parent Trap.This is obviously supposed to be a film for kids, but the film DOESN'T SHOW US THE CONSEQUENCES OF CHEATING OR RULE-BREAKING OR JUST PLAIN EVIL. Some consequences are inferred, but not boldly enough to teach lessons to the kids who are engaged in this reckless behavior.Idiotically, the ISS has a fire on-board and only 3 astronauts can use the ferry Soyuz as a lifeboat. In the middle of that crisis, the MOCR in Houston loses communication with the ISS and Soyuz so communications have to be transferred to...wait for it...Huntsville! Which enables the Space Warriors to save the day from the duplicate MOCR in Huntsville.I've been watching the U.S. Space Program since 1958, and there were so many times that the jargon was inaccurate or the engineering was inaccurate or the history was inaccurate that I was constantly yelling at my TV screen "What Idiots Wrote This?" Not to mention that the most promising character, the girl pilot, pulls the all-too-familiar female neurotic self-doubt angst at the most critical part of the film. A cliché at best. Horribly unnecessary in an age of women's liberation at worst.DON'T WATCH THIS FILM IF YOU THINK YOU OR YOUR KIDS WILL LEARN ANYTHING ABOUT THE SPACE PROGRAM.It was easier for me to suspend my disbelief when I watched Space Chimps. Even with the talking chimps.My suggestion: studio execs should have a person (or team) familiar with the space program, space flight, and space history review this kind of script before allocating money for this sort of useless rubbish.Even though it was totally fictional, Space Cowboys is a much more accurate, plausible, and realistic depiction of the U.S. Space Program.So have your kids watch Space Cowboys instead.
I saw this at the Huntsville Space and Rocket Center. A decent museum with a few interesting exhibits and some cool rockets and replicas. Unfortunately this museum also has movie theater where they charge additional money for films relating to space. The problem began when the attendant recommended "Space Warriors" to us because it was filmed on location at the Space and Rocket Center and in the greater Huntsville area, and also told us, falsely, that it was 45 minutes long. As far as the movie itself goes, it is a complete mess of a film which changes tones for no apparent reason, can't decide whether it's a film or a commercial for space camp and includes actual movie stars who would rather be anywhere else (exception for Josh Lucas who actually seemed to be acting and enjoying chewing the scenery). This brings me to the films biggest problem, Thomas Horn. He plays the lead kid so whiny, so annoying and as such a limp-wristed wiener that you can't possibly take anything in Space Warriors seriously (and it does make the huge mistake of trying to be serious, especially in its third act).There many moments of unintended hilarity in this move. First the "bad" kid from the other team is doing his absolutely best to imitate Val Kilmer as Ice Man in "Top Gun." Second, the team is made up of a complete Burger King Kid's club of stereotypes: nerdy Asian engineer, sassy black girl, Russian computer programmer - they're all here. Add in some WTF unintentional double entendre and you've got movie whose only value is to be made fun while watched Mystery Science Theater style with a few cold ones.