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best movie i've ever seen.

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A family in fear of the man of the house, gangsters, lesbian sex, a pregnant girl and pretty soon, vampires - are all presented to the viewer in quick succession, interrupted by occasional fast-track shots of nudity, blood and gore. The acting is varied, the characters are thinly sketched - we realise the dysfunctional family have a vampire at their head - but there are so many people vying for attention, we're not sure who is who. Are we? Not to worry, however: I don't think clarity is the intention here.This seems to be deliberately made to fit the so-bad-it's-good mould. Clearly, the budget is clearly very low. Director Desi Scarpone keeps things moving quickly, and there are moments of tension. And if you can see through the cheapness of it all, there is occasional gory enjoyment to be had once the vampires are unleashed. But it isn't really well made enough to be the joyous blood spattered free-for-all it would like to be.

"Dark Town" is a halfway decent vampire film.**SPOILERS**As they're trying to celebrate their father's birthday, Sandy Armstrong, (Alison Dian Miller) Curtis Jr., (Rwaling Curtis) Heather, (Sarah Horvath) and Jen, (Janet Martin) along with her lover Lisa, (Meghan Stansfield) get together and await Curtis, Sr., (Joel King) who arrives late. When it finally gets started, a group of gang-members, Rakeem, (Delpano Wills) O-Dog, (Derrick Wayne Smith) Geoff, (Siaka Harding) and Tisha, (Kobina Wright) crash the party to escape a drug deal gone bad, only to find that the entire family are vampires. Trying to escape from the vampires, they eventually turn and fight the group from the inside.The Good News: This wasn't as bad as it was said to be. It's biggest asset is that it delivers exactly what genre fans of this kind of film enjoy. It's over-the-top violent, features enough cheesy action to keep it interesting and there's also a couple of great nudity scenes thrown in for good measure. The violence is pretty graphic, and is quite surprising for a vampire film. Aside from a huge amount of neck bites that freely flow as in normal movies, this one also has a new twist for the vampires in that they now gorge on the flesh of their victims. There's several victims who are surrounded and have several different vampires and begin feasting, ripping up the body quite messily. It pumps up the gore factor quite nicely. There's also nice decent action in here, quite easily seen in the final showdown. Not only highly gory, but features some action scenes as well. And then any film that features a lesbian vampire certainly scores some points in it's favor as well.The Bad News: The one main problem with this film is the same inherent problem all vampire films have, which is that vampires aren't that scary. That is the focus of the film, and it doesn't really provide a way to make them scary. It's a problem with all the vampire films, and this one is no exception. It's also very hard to really figure out what's going on here. There's lot of different subplots going on with no real conclusion to any of them and it just makes for a disjointed beginning half. Nothing really isn't explained either, and is just mostly taken for granted without much explanation. It makes it very easy to get confused in the middle section where nothing is ever shown yet every one is suddenly a vampire. It simply doesn't make much sense all around. There's also a big question mark as to the finale. Just another example of it not really making much sense.The Final Verdict: A nice, gory ride that never really explains itself. It gives the gore, action and nudity when needed, but really struggles when that isn't around. Vampire fans might be more inclined to check this out, while those not really into them might want to exceed with caution.Rated R: Graphic Language, Graphic Violence, Nudity and a sex scene

Lesbian vampires and the background extras from Boyz in the Hood get together for this Troma-esquire debacle. Added to the list of worst vampire movies ever, along with Dracula 3000 and Bram Stoker's Way of the Vampire. The storyline is pretty disjointed, but I guess the basic premise is that there's a bunch of these gangstas who stumble into a - wait for it - drug deal gone wrong! The gangstas (who all hold their guns sideways like the Gangstas they are) escape to the Club and start talking about how there's this white chick who lives nearby who keeps all kinds of drug money in her bedroom. Being OG, Gangstas go to rob her. Only they didn't plan on stepping right into the middle of a Vampire Surprise Birthday Party! Turns out White Girl's dad is vampire, and it's his birthday. By the time the Gangstas show up, Vampire Dad has already infected like everybody else in the family. The family is all dysfunctional and stuff, which I guess means that there's an older sister who's a lesbian.The dysfunctional family vampires infect the gangstas. It turns into an All- Vampire ho-down. The only thing that's missing is the Stevie Wonder/Paul McCartney soundtrack. Ebony and ivory sucking in perfect harmony. In the end, they all stand in front of the skylight and get turned into ash. I don't know what else to say about this thing, and to be honest, I don't want to waste any more of my time or yours talking about it.

oh my.. this movie is not worth your time. its not even cheesy to the point of being funny. it was a waste of a video rental in my opinion. the lesbians were pretty cute, and the over done "urban black youths" were funny.."yoz fool..we gots to get up outta here and kill us some foolz!" i definitely would not recommend this movie to anyone...it makes no sense, the acting is absolutely terrible..and the vampire makeup is very 2nd grade halloween party-ish..ugh... i'm a very big horror fan and this really disappointed me..and now for my seven year old sisters review " amber..i thought this was supposed to be scary..its just a bunch of flashes and ulgy girls with fangs and blood..can we watch something else..?"