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Ghoul School
Two sniveling high school dropouts plot to rob the school janitor and accidentally release toxic chemicals into the school's water supply. The swimming team are the first ones to turn into green-faced flesh-eating zombies, and they promptly go after the rest of the present school populace: two horror movie nerds, the members of a metal band and the world's worst basketball team.
Release : | 1990 |
Rating : | 3.3 |
Studio : | |
Crew : | Hairstylist, Makeup Artist, |
Cast : | Joe Franklin Jackie Martling Richard Bright Carl Burrows Ivan Sergei |
Genre : | Horror |
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Reviews
Surprisingly incoherent and boring
A story that's too fascinating to pass by...
It is encouraging that the film ends so strongly.Otherwise, it wouldn't have been a particularly memorable film
Worth seeing just to witness how winsome it is.
This uproariously atrocious piece of cheerfully cheap'n'chintzy low-budget horror splatter schlock has to be one of the funniest things I've had the pleasure to watch in quite some time. Granted, most of the humor is strictly of the unintentional kind, but it's still often sidesplitting just the same. A toxic chemical gets into the water supply at a New Jersey high school. A bunch of folks are transformed into fanged, growling, blue-skinned flesh-eating zombies who go on the rampage. Trapped inside the school with the ghouls are two irritating horror movie fanboy geeks and a severely talent-challenged wailing, roaring, head-banging heavy metal hair band. Boy, does this delightfully dreadful doozy possess all the right-so-utterly-wrong-they're-paradoxically-right schlock flick stuff to measure up as a real four-star gut-busting stinker: sloppy direction, a crude wafer-thin script, obnoxious foul-mouthed dialogue (the ridiculously excessive overuse of the almighty "f" bomb is downright mind-numbing), terrible acting, a tacky hum'n'shiver synthesizer score, cruddy make-up f/x, a hopelessly dated groovy-bumping rock soundtrack, laughably hokey rinky-dink over-the-top gross-out gore, and a horrendous abrupt ending. Poor Richard Bright (Al Neri in the "Godfather" features!) pops up as the jerky principal. Befuddled talk show host Joe Franklin and annoying comedian Jackie "the Joke Man" Martling briefly appear as themselves in an especially awful drawn-out sequence (Martling tells Franklin some of the worst, most groan-inducing and painfully unfunny jokes you never want to hear). Favorite line: "This is one very *beep*ed-up nightmare." Filmed in Wayne, New Jersey, where stuff like this happens all the time. A shamefully unsung should-be camp crap classic.
Don't bother. I'm a self-made authority on "good" B-movies, and this ain't one of them. It might have been alright were it not so self-conscious in its clearly purposeful attempts at badness. In other words, if the stuff in this straight-to-video yawner were unintentional (as in "Troll 2," for example), it might be worth a look. But, since it's not, neither is this movie.
This movie is a riot! It must have been directed with the idea of adding all the bad production values of a B rated picture. Favorite moments are the pool scene with the two swim coaches. The woman coach has an obviously fake blonde wig and the guy doesn't have the sound match what he's saying at one point, so it looks like the old Godzilla movies. The expressions on their faces when they see the ghouls are PRICELESS! Also the (meant to be bad) editing of the Jackie Martling scenes with Joe Franklin are a hoot. This intentional laugh at itself movie tickles you just as it's grossing you out. This is destined to be a cult classic!
This movie is bad. Not the good kind of bad. But the really boring "let's stop the tape and see what's on basic cable" kind of bad.