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Touches You

Fresh and Exciting

The movie turns out to be a little better than the average. Starting from a romantic formula often seen in the cinema, it ends in the most predictable (and somewhat bland) way.

Actress is magnificent and exudes a hypnotic screen presence in this affecting drama.

I can't believe that someone got paid to make this and what is even worse is that they got paid to make another one that is very similar. This is a perfect example of how very bad scripts, writing, directing etc. is getting into production, while so many very good & talented work out there is being turned down. I really will like to understand the politics behind all of these obviously bad decisions. My only logic is that it must be that they make such films that are unacceptable for viewing, in sure hopes that they will come and go without any notice, only to serve as a tax write off for the rich. At least they can give the money to young and talented producers, writers, directors, etc. to practice with low budget productions!

From the tens of thousands of movies I've seen, it's sometimes difficult to pick my favorite. However, after watching 118 minutes of 'A Slice Of Terror', I will now have a definitive answer when asked what is the worst movie I've ever seen. This is it! The teens in the picture must have been doing time in some prison and got their sentences reduced by playing the nude scenes. Forget about the acting because there is no acting in the entire film. This might be a good film to show at a Christmas party with guests you wish to leave early. Webster doesn't have any word to describe how awful this movie is. (I even hate to call it a movie as I'm not sure what it was).

Sometimes there are movies that are just so bad they're funny or campy, like those of Ed Wood. This isn't one of them. It's embarrassing and painful. My comments would have stopped there except IMDb.com insists a review have a minimum of ten lines and therefore I will include the following; Don't waste your time. Don't waste your money. Don't bother trying to find anything redeeming about this movie. I bet the actors have never admitted to being in this, even when they're drunk. To fill up the remaining 5 lines I can only repeat myself.Sometimes there are movies that are just so bad they're funny or campy, like those of Ed Wood. This isn't one of them. It's embarrassing and painful. My comments would have stopped there except IMDb.com insists a review have a minimum of ten lines and therefore I will include the following; Don't waste your time. Don't waste your money. Don't bother trying to find anything redeeming about this movie.

In my defense, it wasn't my choice to rent this, it was my boyfriend's. That being said, I watched it (most of it) and I must say that this may be the worst movie I have ever seen. This film trumps itself as being a gay satire of horror films but it is most definitely not. See, satire is supposed to be funny. Actually satire is supposed to be--as defined--irony, sarcasm, or caustic wit used to attack or expose folly, vice, or stupidity. This film contained no irony, no sarcasm, nor did it contain any wit (caustic or otherwise) but it did contain plenty of folly, vice, and oodles of stupidity. It's just stupid, stupid, stupid. Filmed with the lowest possible quality (which perhaps was done to match the quality of the writing, acting, cinematography, editing and directing) video. I didn't even think they still sold VHS camcorders, and perhaps that's not what it was filmed on, but it certainly looks like it (it could be the worst possible DV transfer ever however). The cinematography is just awful, whoever was behind the camera must have seen that there was an FX button on the side and pushed it at the most odd and random moments, incorporating such FX as negative, wide, and stretch...which would detract from the scene if there was anything worth watching in the first place (and in the case of the scene shot in negative, we see that the writer/director doesn't brush his teeth). And so we move on to the writing. The story is about a 'gay nerd' who delivers pizza's, he's one day beaten down by a group of teens for simply bumping into one of them. To get revenge he hypnotizes a counselor so that he'll hypnotize the students who are forced to see the counselor so that the 'gay nerd' (Zaffo) can teach them what it's like to be humiliated. And of course that means making them get it on in a huge simulated sex orgy at the end of the film. It sounds funny (and possibly could be if it was written by someone more talented, like a group of retarded monkeys), but its attempts at humor is painfully unfunny. And the writer (who stars as Zaffo AND serves as director) seems to really love the word 'humiliate(d)' seeing how it is said in seemingly every other line of the script. The cast is probably made up of the local high school gay pride club. None of them are believable, and I'd especially like to point out that the Bobby Trendy cameo has him at one point looking off to the side as though he was trying to find the nearest exit. And since I hate this movie more then I hate mushrooms (and I really hate mushrooms) I'm going to sum up the rest of the review by saying: It's also edited by an epileptic mole (seeing how mole's are blind) with a large amount of two second scenes that seem like they're simply trimmings from what should have been a longer scene.This is a movie that is worse then porn, actually...if it had been a real porn it might have been funny. But it wasn't porn, it wasn't funny. It didn't have the courage to actually have sex scenes, just simulated sex scenes, and a few shots of penises. If it were a porn I could understand the crappy production value. But it wasn't. It was a 'gay satire of horror films' (as it says on the cover). And I only wish that I could personally destroy every single copy. And it was everything I could do to not rip my eyeballs from their sockets and step on them with my own feet to make the pain stop.Don't watch this movie, and if you have to at least make a drinking game out of it, everyone drink anytime someone says the words 'humiliate', or 'humiliated' and hopefully you will pass out 20 minutes into it's near two hour running time.I scored this movie as a 1 out of ten, because they don't let you rate a film with a ZERO!!!!